I will always love you
by mystorriessuck
Summary: Insight into Katherines thoughts and pain in 1864- She always loved Damon and Stefan- and she always will. Her pain that came with letting them go. She never meant to hurt them. After all she was only Katherine. Her thoughts and feelings leading up to the days before Stefan and Damon became vampires, and what happened afterwards. i suck at summaries. sorry. Rating may change.


**I guess u could call this kind of a AU story because the plotlines, continuity this story take doesn't match with the show…but hey! We all know (Katherine really does love Damon) Short drabble rlly nothing special- **

**Katherine in 1864 as she thinks about what she's leaving behind in Mystic falls. Why she loved both brothers, why she left. And why she always told Damon she never loved him even when she did.**

Katherine knew that the rounding of the vampires would start soon.

It would begin Tomorrow in fact; she had only one night left with them.

George Lockwood had promised the plan would carry through, everything was set in motion. She regretted she would have to lose countless friends in order to secure her future, but it had to be done.

She had promised her mother she would take care of herself first and foremost.

Her mind reflected on the only one thing she didn't want to leave behind... Damon and Stefan. She knew she was going to miss them both. She didn't even know it was possible to be in love with two people at the same time. She loved them equally. And because of this she didn't dare admit her love for both.

It wasn't right. It wasn't normal. No one would believe her that she loved them the same.

She watched Damon from behind a crack in the door, as he read "Call of the Wild "on his bed. He looked pale and undernourished from the war. She was worried for him, what horrors had he encountered in the war? How many lives had he taken for the confederacy? She knew he would never be the same again. In his short life he had experienced humanity at its worse.

She had promised him a life of immortality and forever with her. But she knew she would not keep her promise. She wouldn't curse him with this life. She never meant to fall in love with him. He wouldn't be part of her plan. It had to be a clean break. No visits. This was the last night she would see him.

She had fed him her blood, out of lust, she knew it was wrong, to lead him on like that, to promise him a future with her. In many ways she wanted it to, but she knew it wasn't possible. She was selfish and she knew it, playing games. It was one of her faults, and would probably come back to bite her, but what was she to do? She did_ love _them, she had just forgotten how to love.

She knocked on his door, pretending she had just arrived.

"Damon?" she spoke softly. "Katherine?" he said jumping from his bed.

Her heart stung as he approached her, she could see he was madly in love with her. He crept closer, reaching to kiss her quickly. She loved him for that, he wasn't afraid to touch her. He was full of passion.

He reached in hugging her, and she returned the favour, her lips brushed his neck, and her gums throbbed, her eyes changed to red.

She could smell the blood, pulsating underneath his skin. The blood smelt sweet.

"You can have some if you want…" Damon murmured, arching his neck.

"No, Damon its okay" she said, grasping his fingers into hers.

"Sit with me" she said, crossing the room to sit on Damon's bed.

Damon followed, sitting a polite distance away from her.

"Promise me something?" She sighed. "Anything" Damon said back.

"That you'll always know I love you. No matter what, " she whispered,

grabbing his hand again. Damon smiled, his ice blue eyes staring into hers.

"Is something going on Katherine? Is something wrong?" he asked.

"No Damon" She quickly replied, lying.

Her heart broke inside. Did she really want to fake her own death just to stay well hidden from Klaus? Even if it meant leaving Damon and Stefan? When had she become so selfish, so deceitful?

She wondered that after she had faked her death; if he would forget about her, continue on with his human life. Find a nice girl, have children…

Katherine didn't notice, as Damon crept closer to her. Inching in towards another kiss. She grabbed his shirt pulling him closer, fiercely kissing him.

Katherine was hungry for him. She would never see him again…she pushed him onto the bed, climbing on top of him. She ripped of his shirt, exposing his chest. He tried to roll on top of her. But she was having none of it. His ice blue eyes stared into hers as she took off her undergarments.

They had sex a couple times before, but Katherine knew this would be the most passionate. Over the last three hundred years she had been a vampire, she had never had passionate sex before. That was until she arrived at the Salvatore mansion.

Damon was a good performer, for a human. She recognised his strength and endurance to keep up with her, but she still had to be careful not to hurt him.

After they had finished, Damon rolled onto his side, falling almost immediately to sleep. She smiled, as he watched how peaceful he looked.

She cringed at her selfishness, as she knew the hurt that was coming his way, in a few hours he would believe that she was dead, and he would believe it for the rest of his life.

She watched as Damon shivered slightly, she grabbed the blanket from the end of the bed, and covered Damon with it.

"Goodbye Damon' she whispered so quiet he would never hear.

**REVIEW if you would like me to continue! Xxx point out in grammatical errors.**


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